Friday, December 30, 2011

Bone deep exhaustion

I love my family. I adore my children. I get along with Odysseus's parents better than I do my mother and aunts.

That said, I am so glad the holiday season is, for the most part over. Now, we just need to recover from it, and the colds that we each had going into it. I have a house to clean, kids (and spouse) to care for, and this utter exhaustion that Christmas caused can fuck the fuck off. With cheez. I don't have the time to deal with it, or the luxury to indulge it.

Cross-posted at the anti-soma.

Friday, December 23, 2011


I'm not the biggest fan of the Christmas season, partially because I think the commercial aspect is so overdone that the meaning behind the holiday disappears, and partially because my family overspends so horribly (when they're on fixed income and in debt over their heads), can't seem to get together without fighting, and kind of go into hyperventilating hysterics of excitement where it comes to opening presents.

That said, people who get offended by the mere mention of Christmas can f-off. I do not appreciate political correctness trying to marginalize those of us who are Christian at any time, much less during our highest holy days of Christmas and Easter. They bend over so far backwards for Muslims on their holidays that they wind up with their heads firmly inserted into someplace dark, humid, and fragrant, but choose to be "offended" by any mention of Christmas or Christ that they hyperventilate over a simple wish for a happy holiday season. They work so hard to force Christ out of the season that they've harassed cashiers into saying "Happy Holidays," and taken all references to Christmas out of Christmas plays (now called "Solstice concerts" for small children), Christmas Break (now called "Winter Break"), and even Christmas trees ("Holiday trees--the one at the White House features Obama, this year).

I'm so tired of all the political correctness that I've started going out of my way to offend those individuals. I wish people a "Merry Christmas," loudly, and with a smile that carries the glee of feeling like I've pissed somebody off.

And that, especially in this time of year, isn't right.

*Cross posted to the anti-soma.

Friday, December 16, 2011


Head 'splode. Posted on anti-soma. Go read and see why. Warning: have some way to manage your blood pressure, first.

Friday, December 9, 2011

Al Gore and global warmists

I am getting so sick of the hand-wringing, Prius-driving, nihilistic, save Mother Nature ecoweenies. It's bad enough that they're always preaching at us (eating meat is killing the environment, using incandescent bulbs is killing the environment, breathing and farting and fucking and breeding is killing the environment), but now they're endangering our children, too. First, we have the couple almost two years ago that shot their kids (baby girl survived, toddler brother didn't) then themselves, and now we've got a school headmaster in Britain turning off the heat in his school on the coldest day of the year so far to reduce their carbon footprint.

Al Gore, and all of the brainless fart muffins that bloviate about how the earth is going to burn up and drown from rising sea levels AT THE SAME TIME!!! can fuck right the fuck off. May each and every one of the global warming consensus be assplowed by the First Wookie riding a bio-diesel four-wheeler, using her brainless husband as a strap on. With rancid habanero nacho cheez product dip as a lubricant.

I can tell them that no, global warming is not caused by humans, it is a natural cycle , of which we are on the cooler half of. Ask anybody who has joints that hurt when the weather gets cold, and then ask them if they'd prefer some more of that global warming magic.

Friday, December 2, 2011

Someone needs her legs sewn together.

Watch this. Then tell me you don't agree with what I've written below (language alert).

Listen, honey. YOU are the only one responsible for the situation you're in. YOU opened your legs, without the benefit of being married (not that any man worth spit would have you), or the use of a DAMN CONDOM! Fuck right the fucking fuck off, with a--no, never mind that. I don't want to even suggest anything remotely to do with sex to this...individual.

May this filthy, welfare crack whore twatwaffle wake one morning to find that her funds have been cut off, and her children taken, and find herself in some sort of transportation on the way to the veterinarian to get spayed.

Cross posted to the anti-soma.

Friday, November 25, 2011

Black Friday

Black Friday hysteria can fuck right the fuck off. I don't think even the opening of fucking hunting season garners as much media hysteria as Black fucking Friday, the opening of Christmas Holiday Gift Giving Shopping Season. What kind of stupid fucking putzes fucking trample each other to be the first to buy that 55" flatscreen TV that's on sale for 2% off the regular price (after figuring for the stores carefully jacking up their prices weeks before so that they can hype that the thing is 40% off!!1!1!!)? And what kind of fucking jackals fucking set up fucking NEWS CAMERAS in fucking hopes of fucking catching footage of fucking twatwaffles worked up BY THE FUCKING MEDIA'S FUCKING OVERHYPING OF THE FUCKING SALES fucking TRAMPLING little old ladies and children?!

May whoever started that particular shit-ball rolling find their own special level of hell when they die, and find that their punishment is to be the door greeter at a big box store on Black Friday--for all eternity.

And if they're already dead, I'm sure they've been reincarnated as a dung-beetle by now.

Cross-posted to the anti-soma.

Friday, November 18, 2011

Sorry so disjointed, but this is personal.

Several levels, this week. Let's start with the closest: flashbacks can fuck off. So can news stories that cause said flashbacks. I don't need the nightmares and panic attacks.

The creeps in the Penn State football program can fuck right the fuckety fuck off. Both the fucking sick child-raping fuck that was fucking caught raping a ten-year-old in the showers, and tried to brush it off as "horsing around," and the even sicker fucking bastard that not only did nothing to stop it, but tried to cover it up. May the two of them go to general population in prison, and become cellmates with a person with a giant cock that's proportional to them like they are to the poor kids they harmed.

The judge that let the child rapist go without bail or a monitoring ankle bracelet can more than fuck right fucking fuckety fuck off. May that cunt get raped in such a way that she's as damaged as the kids she was supposed to put those evil bastards away to protect. May she be disbarred from serving as judge, lawyer, politician, or anything in which she'd come into contact with children ever in her life. May she be shunned by everyone everywhere, with no one willing to help her should she ever need it.

I know what those kids are going through. So does anyone my male genetic donor ever coached in little league or basketball.

Friday, November 11, 2011

Entitlement mentality

The entitlement mentality behind the occupy whatever movement can fuck off. Some of us are grown ups, have jobs, can distinguish between needs and wants, live beneath our means to the best of our ability, and are getting pretty disgusted with the reenactment of Lord of the Flies in our parks and cities by spoiled children screaming "Somebody needs to give me a pony!"

Friday, November 4, 2011

Grading. Paperwork.

It can all fuck off.

I just picked up papers, and according to my contract, I'm required to have them back to my students by Saturday (it says 72 hours). I've also been helping a colleague whose eyes can't tolerate looking at a computer screen for long periods with his online grading, and one of his students plagiarized her last assignment--five out of nine questions, from four different websites--and most of the rest totally butchered one of my favorite poets. I have more to do tomorrow, and that can fuck off.

So can the fact that the administration is pushing more and more of the paperwork they were originally hired to do onto the faculty. Like we don't have enough to do with the aforementioned grading.

Having all this to do all this with two sick toddlers can really fuck off.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Being buried under an avalanche of stuff that needs done.

That can fuck off. Especially when you've got a toddler hanging off of one side of you, and a toddler-in-waiting hanging off the other, both wanting you to stop working and start playing with them.

(I'd much rather play with the kids than work.)

Oh, and panic attacks suck, and can fuck right the fucking fuckety fuck off. I really didn't need that today.

Friday, October 21, 2011

I got nothin'

Nothing besides petty complaints about how early children tend to wake up. My pixie started taking her first independent steps this week. She's ten and a half months old.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Government. Again.

First up is that Blooming idiot mayor of NYC, who asserts that pushing healthy food is the highest responsibility of government. Second one is the mental health "professionals" pushing to add lithium to the drinking water supply.

The second one bothers me. Seriously, are they planning to try to overdose those who have it prescribed? If not, how are they going to avoid it? Say they reduce the doLinksage: what if the patient that needs it doesn't drink enough tap water to receive the dose they need? That doesn't even count the whole concern over their reasoning: that places with naturally high levels of lithium in the drinking water have lower incidences of violence and suicide. So, in other words, they want to drug the masses into somnolence, just like schools do the active kids (ADHD meds for kids that are bored by low expectations and easy work, anyone?).

And last, but not least, Topeka, KS, deciding that the place to save money is in refusing to prosecute domestic violence cases. Umm...what? You mean assault isn't a felony when it's assault committed on a spouse? Interesting. And revolting. The place to cut the city's budget is in the paychecks of useless bureaucrats: either cut salaries or cut positions.

That is all for this week, but I think that's enough.

Friday, October 7, 2011

My mom's family

My mother has three sisters. Two of my aunts have no backbone. One of them is mentally/emotionally about ten years old, despite being in her mid fifties. Both are incredibly passive-aggressive. The other aunt is a bully. Two aunts, the bully and the child, tend to punish my mom for things I do to make her mad.

They all compete over who is in worse health and how, whose back/shoulders/hips/knees hurt more, who is in worse shape financially. They compete over whose life is more stressful. I grew up around this kind of one-upsmanship, and sometimes it's really hard to keep sympathizing with people's problems from turning into this because of that early training.

My mom and her sisters need therapy. They need a lot of therapy. I don't recall one interaction that was healthy between the four of them in all of my twenty-some-odd years of memory. They can't all get together without somebody starting a fight.

It was interacting with my mom's family on Thanksgiving, Christmas, and birthdays that made me hate family get-togethers. Honestly, the only thing that's saved Thanksgiving and Christmas from total hatred is the time we've spent with my in-laws the past ten or so years.

Tomorrow, I'm permitting all of my family to gather for celebrating my son's third birthday (which happened yesterday). I'm afraid the trends will hold, and someone will start a fight, I'll react to protect my children from jealous harpies messing with their heads, and my mom will be punished for me removing my kids from that situation. And, since it's not fair to my kids that they don't get to know their family, I don't know that I really have many options.

And that can fuck off.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Teething? Tummy troubles?

Whatever it is that's making the pixie sleep so badly the past few days (and nights) can fuck right off.

So can Michael Bloomberg--dude, you're not my daddy. Neither is anyone in the government. Stop trying to act like you are.

Friday, September 23, 2011


The fucking fucks that fucking write fucking malware code and fucking computer viruses can fuck off to the fucking level of fucking hell reserved for child molesters and those who talk in the theater. I'm still trying to fucking fix the shit fucking screwed up by FUCKING malware found by my virus scanner yesterday. I still can't sign into my university's distance learning program to get yesterday's grading done.

Friday, September 16, 2011


A former student of mine was recently diagnosed with Munchhausen's by Proxy by a DFS worker that never met her, and lost custody of her youngest. That can fuck off so hard that the DFS worker's grandparents feel it, investigate it, and bitchslap the worker for being such a dumb cunt. That individual is in no way an abusive parent.

FUCKING DFS can FUCK THE FUCK OFF for FUCKING being so FUCKING non-FUCKING-functional that children are placed in fucking horribly abusive fucking foster homes and/or fucking group homes, FUCKING after FUCKING being FUCKING removed from loving, non-abusive homes because some FUCKING FUCKETY FUCK of a FUCKING TWATWAFFLE can't FUCKING recognize FUCKING parental rights and FUCKING parental discipline because their FUCKING FUCKWAD FUCKS of parents never FUCKING LOVED THEM ENOUGH TO BOTHER BEING FUCKING PARENTS.

Friday, September 9, 2011


Too much tending of cranky, mildly injured baby, not enough sleep. No energy to tell anyone to fuck off. Have at it.

Friday, September 2, 2011

Teething, among other things.

Teething can fuck right the fuck off. The imp just finished cutting his baby teeth, and the pixie is just starting. Last week, she was both sick with a tummy virus and cutting four top teeth. All at once. This week, she's working on two more bottom teeth, which is really messing up her (already bad) sleep habits.

FEMA can fuck right off with spinning, spiked knobs. And cheese. Instead of pulling the funding to fix infrastructure, they should have pulled the trailer park they're still working on constructing.

Hurricane Irene can fuck off. The nasty heat wave that this summer has been can fuck off.

I'm so tired of all the shit that's going on in the world at large and in my life in particular (I'm going to blog it on The Antisoma later) that I just want to curl up in a little ball in a dark room and hide for a while. And that can fuck off, too.

Friday, August 19, 2011


I have one.  Have had more and less for about four days, now.  And it can fuck off.

Have at it.

Friday, August 12, 2011


I only have one thing to add to the following video's rant:

Mr. President, shut the FUCK up.  Every time you've fucking gone in front of a fucking camera for the past two fucking weeks, the market has SHIT THE BED. PLEASE stop telling us that everything's going to be better, now--we can't afford for our markets to lose ANOTHER FUCKING TWO THOUSAND FUCKING POINTS.

Friday, August 5, 2011

Too fucking hot...

Our A/C cannot keep up.  The kids can't play outside.  The imp is going stir crazy, and driving his daddy and me even more batty.

So, yeah: this heat wave can fuck right the fuck off.  It's even sapping the energy with which I'd like to tell it to fuck off.

Friday, July 29, 2011

Most of our "leadership" can fuck off.


I'm afraid I won't have a country left for my children to grow up in.

Friday, July 22, 2011

Adjunct abuse can fuck off.

I recently found out that two of my university's adjuncts quit--despite having had two classes each assigned for the fall semester.

I don't blame them, even a little.  My university hasn't given adjuncts a raise since before I graduated from high school.  Since the university set up the new database that does everything, the adjuncts don't get paid until the last working day of either September or February, depending on the semester.

By state law and university rules, we're forbidden from teaching more than four courses per year (summer doesn't count), and from teaching even 200 level survey courses. 

We get no benefits (which I can't argue with--I don't need benefits), no chance at tenure track positions (again, can't argue--though I wish some of the tenured faculty were fireable), and a quarter of the pay of the full-time non-tenured faculty, and an eighth of the pay of the non-tenured, nonessential administration.

From what I gather, we're treated well at our university.  And that can fuck off.

Friday, July 15, 2011

Whatever's making the baby a nocturnal creature can fuck off.

I mean, seriously: she's gone from happily going to bed between 8:30 and 9:30 to reluctantly going to bed at 10:30 or later.  Which means Mommy gets a lot less sleep. 

I don't know if it's teething, or teething causing an earache, or possibly (but not likely, given that she's not running even a slight fever) a minor ear infection.  But whatever it is, it can fuck off.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Just because I don't make much doesn't mean I'm willing to use government aid.

I cannot count how many times a well-meaning acquaintance (or nosy but well-meaning stranger) has suggested that, because my pay from the college is so niggardly (wouldn't even pay for child care for a part-time job), I need to apply for WIC. While yes, accepting food stamps and medicaid would take a lot of stress off our budget, we're getting by just fine.

Yesterday, we took the imp to a speech therapist for an assessment. The therapist suggested, since we have a high deductible insurance that might not cover the sessions anyway, that we use the state-funded, social-work-based, in home therapy for under threes.

Thanks. Thanks a lot. Because our insurance might not pay $300/month, you don't want to deal with us. In spite of the fact that we are eminently willing to pay cash to take care of our son. We do, after all, happily pay for their doctors' appointments out of pocket. We also pay out of pocket to feed, clothe, and shelter them--there's no difference between that and supplying any other need.

Where the FUCK do people FUCKING get OFF suggesting that we FUCKING BEG FOR FUCKING GOVERNMENT FUCKING AID??? I was FUCKING RAISED on fucking food stamps, fucking welfare, and fucking medicaid--and was fucking not fucking able to get as good of fucking medical care as individuals with insurance. I wasn't fucking able to go shopping for fucking food without fucking getting treated like a fucking pariah. Don't even talk about clothes--my husband bought me my first new pair of jeans--ever--while we were dating.

So no. I'm not willing to accept fucking government fucking "aid." It's always a hundred dollars short and three months late*.

*FEMA is only just now beginning to build a trailer park for those made homeless by the tornado a month ago. They've gone so far as to move heavy equipment to the lot where they're going to build it. Just one problem with this expression of generosity: almost all of the people made homeless a month ago are no longer homeless.

Friday, July 1, 2011

When are they going to ban stupid parents, instead?

Nanny government can fuck right the fuck off. With a full size copy of the Constitution and Declaration of Independence rolled up and shoved sideways up congress's collective ass.

Did you know that drop-side cribs have been banned because some idiots can't read and follow instructions, and their kids smothered between the rail and the mattress when the mis-assembled mess's rail fell out of the bottom? The nanny-government sanctioned alternatives are the cribs with one side lower than the other (dangerous when baby starts pulling up), or all four sides higher than I can reach over with an infant.

We've seen the same with some types of umbrella strollers, where kids either fell out or got severe finger injuries because their stupid fucking parents couldn't be bothered to fasten the safety harness. I cannot tell you how traumatizing having to watch the "Never Shake a Baby" safety DVD was before I left the hospital without my son (it was a requirement to checkout before I could go home "with [my] baby.")

I've seen truly obese kids--a friend's neice was 100 lbs at 4--whose parents fed them junk instead of playing with them. I've seen people think that the booster seats--required for the kids' safety with the shoulder belts--are to help them see over the dash in the front seat. I've seen parents that give their kids cell phones with cameras and unlimited texting plans, and we've all seen where that ends up.

Why the hell are the sane and competent parents being punished by bans on useful items because some idiots can't seem to use them right?

Friday, June 24, 2011

Summer class students

I don't know what it is, but it always seems like my summer class students are under the impression that they'll have to do less work than a full semester student, and like they're entitled to an easier class. That attitude can fuck right the fuck off. I'm giving up free time with my kids to teach their sorry, stupid asses (and dear God are this summer's students stupid), and they don't bother to read the damn textbook before asking me questions that I FUCKING ANSWERED IN THE FUCKING TEXTBOOK!!! Then, when I ANSWER said question, and tell them that it was in chapter X on X page in the textbook, THEY FUCKING HAVE THE FUCKING BALLS TO FUCKING TELL ME THAT THEY MAYBE SHOULD HAVE FUCKING READ THE FUCKING TEXTBOOK!! Only fucking MAYBE!!

And that doesn't address the whole FUCKING asking the FUCKING same FUCKING question FUCKING OVER AND OVER again, because they FUCKING didn't bother to read the damn FUCKING answer and FUCKING apply it to their FUCKING question the FIRST FUCKING TIME.

I hate summer classes. I wouldn't mind so much if I had the students that were taking summer classes because they were overachievers, but it seems like I never do.

I'd also like to send out a huge FUCK YEAH!!! to my 2 1/2 year old son for actually crapping in his potty chair for the first time this morning !!!

Friday, June 17, 2011


Three out of four of us--the baby is the only one who doesn't seem miserable.

Both parents being sick at once can really fuck off.

Friday, June 10, 2011

Cable company

Recently, we told AT&T to fuck off for their new data caps on their DSL. Now, I'd like to tell our cable company to FTFO: for the second week in a row, we've had an internet/phone outage. This time, thankfully, it was only a couple hours instead of the whole day.

And thankfully, this time, it happened on a Friday, instead of some other day of the workweek--summer classes (even online ones) meet MTWTh.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Worn out. Have at it.

Was on the road yesterday around five hours for a round trip—three of those with a baby in the back screaming at the top of her lungs at random intervals—taking said baby to meet a relative. I'm a bit too worn out to be angry about much this morning…so have at it.

Thursday, May 26, 2011


Tornados—especially ones that park themselves next to hospitals—can fuck right the fuck off.

Looters. Looters can fuck right off to the special level of hell reserved for child molesters and those who talk in movie theaters.

People who complain about no music on radio stations offering storm and recovery coverage 24/7—and are helping people find their loved ones in the mess in Joplin—can fuck right off. Listen to your iPods or CDs. We're working on surviving.

People who complain about no cable or internet when they're still pulling survivors out of the wreckage in Joplin can fuck right off. You can complain when everyone is accounted for.

I'm posting this early because while we're safe, we had to go to my mother's to get internet access. And I'm too mentally exhausted to get worked up about this.

Friday, May 20, 2011

I really shouldn’t be complaining…

Having to set my alarm to get up an hour or two before the baby so that I can get things done can fuck off. I adore both my kids, but I really wish herding the butt limpet (really, he runs up behind me, wraps his arms around my hips as far as they'll go, and presses his face into my butt, giggling when I try to shake him off), and dealing with days of "I won't sleep unless you're holding me and I'm nursing" exhaust me to the point that I can't get much done after they both go to bed.

I can fuck off for complaining, but damn if I don't need a babysitter sometimes.

Friday, May 13, 2011


We are having our yearly infestation invasion of ants. We cannot figure out where they're coming in, why they're coming in, nor can we prevent them from coming in. And with a toddler and an infant, we can't spray all of the routes we've found inside—most are in the kitchen, but many are in the baby's room, or right behind the toddler's potty chair in the bathroom.

Ants. Ants can fuck off. Ants can fuck off with a giant can of ant and roach spray. I HATE ants with a bloody purple passion.

Friday, May 6, 2011


All four members of my family being sick with a cold at once can fuck off.

Not being able to ease my children's stuffed up sinuses can fuck off.

Not being able to take Sudafed can fuck off.

My state contemplating making pseuduoephedrine products available by prescription only can fuck off with rusty razorblade lined baseball bats. Lubricated with ghost pepper oil. May the sponsors of that bill be ass-plowed by the First Wookie on a four-wheeler wearing her giant prick of a husband as a strap-on.

That's all for me, but I think that's enough.

Friday, April 29, 2011

DC Comics can fuck off.

Superman has always stood for truth, justice, and the American way, no matter where he went. The creators of the character and the comic were American and proud of it. They believed that the American way was the best way.

DC Comics obviously don't feel the same way. They're having Superman renounce his US citizenship. They're having him say he's tired of his actions being interpreted as US policy. Once upon a time, we had presidents who would have been willing to back his actions, and a country who would have been thrilled to export our concepts of justice and freedom for all.

Actually, now that I think of it, maybe it isn't DC comics that can fuck off. Maybe it's our current political class and politically active intelligencia that needs to fuck off. Maybe DC Comics is only reprehensible for bowing to the tastes of those groups, rather than the majority of their readers.

I don't know. I only know that DC has fucked up an icon of my childhood, and I'm really not sure how I feel about it.

Friday, April 22, 2011

Don't feel quite right about posting anything, this weekend.

I hope everyone has a great Easter, and hope at least some of you get a couple days off for it.

Friday, April 15, 2011


Last week, there was a huge stink about the whole budget mess. I love the way ASM826 put it—the debt is the mountain of shit at a cattle ranch, and the deficit is the load from the day, carried out to be dumped onto the mountain.

Congress can fuck off for using a teacup to remove shit from the deficit, rather than taking a backhoe to the mountain of debt. My GRANDKIDS won't be able to pay off what they're doing today. We went to war with the British over shit like this—it's nothing more nor less than taxing our future with no representation—and those fucknuckles are squabbling over what they want to add to the debt load carried by our descendants ten times removed.

A housewife could design a better budget, one that would have our soldiers in no danger of going unpaid. Nor would it treat the social security (mis)trust fund like a piggy bank to pay for treats.

So yeah, congress can fuck the fuck off for being the idiot going on a spending spree with other people's credit cards. And we the people can fuck off for electing them and handing them ours.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Chidren's colds

Both my kids have one. And they can fuck off big time (the colds, not the kids). When I get sick, I have the understanding that it's not that bad, and won't last that long. My son, however, has the worst cold he's ever had, is hoarse, and doesn't understand that he won't feel so bad forever. All my four month old daughter understands is that her little head hurts, and she can't breathe properly.

I'd rather be much sicker than I currently am than have my kids sick.

That, and grading papers, is pretty much all I've got, today. The floor is yours.

Friday, April 1, 2011


It took my grandfather and uncle, but left my male genetic donor. Now it's taking loved ones from Ricki.

Cancer sucks worse than politicians.

Friday, March 25, 2011

My time is not my own

I've got no time or ability to write seriously on my own stuff, be it academic paper ideas (I posted, briefly, on two ideas I had over at the anti-soma), short story, novels, or my blog. Don't get me wrong: I love being a mommy, but I sincerely wish my baby girl could nap alone. Unless it's bedtime--then, thankfully, she sleeps all night--she wakes up as soon as I put her down in her crib.

So: being barely able to keep up with everything I need to do every day can fuck off. Having no time to simply be can definitely fuck off.

I need some range time for some lead-based therapy.

Friday, March 18, 2011

Centered on Japan

Gilbert Godfried, 50 Cent, and every insensitive pinheaded twatwaffle that mocked Japan's disaster can fuck off with prejudice.

Enviroweenies that swear that the earthquake was caused by global warming (and they are out there) can fuck off. I'm praying for all of them to receive the Darwin Award they so richly deserve.

The total lack of understanding of how the earthquakes impacted the nuclear plants, and how so many are sure we're looking at another Chernobyl, can also fuck off. So can the instant cry of "We must eradicate nuclear power because the plants are soooo dangerous!!!"

There is so much hype about everything that everyone is losing sight of Japan's earthquake victims. After all, the idea that Japanese people are dying of dehydration, starvation, exposure, and other issues but aren't looting everything isn't as sexy in the news as the specter of a nuclear meltdown.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Turning 32.

Gas prices can fuck right off--otherwise, we'd have my mother watching the kids while we went to the range.

The fucktard-in-chief and his merry fucking band of fucking idiots can fuck right off for opposing the policies and actions that could ease it can fuck off so hard their wives can taste it.

Have at it.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Government Bureaucratic Overreach can fuck off.

Especially when something like this gets our guys killed. Who the FUCKING hell assumes that a FUCKING US agency can do FUCK-ALL about a Mexican drug cartel? Hello, they're fucking not fucking American fucking citizens--an American criminal action fucking cannot do one fucking thing about them. It's been fucking demonstrated that the fucking Mexicans can't either. So, why are the fucking idiot fucking BATFE letting guns walk across the border?

The quote that really made my blood boil was from an e-mail from a supervisor: "If you don't think this is fun you're in the wrong line of work... Maybe the Maricopa County jail is hiring detention officers and you can get $30,000 ... to serve lunch to inmates..."


This has already killed one of our border patrol agents. How many more will this moronic policy kill before the BATFE is de-funded for rampant stupidity?

Because, seriously, unless the case they're trying to make is against American gun manufacturers and sellers, this policy doesn't make sense. And if the case they're trying to make is against gun manufacturers and sellers...well, that's a whole 'nother fuck-off.

Friday, February 25, 2011

typing one handed, today...

Whoever stole this guy's prosthetic leg is lower than a snake's trail and can really fuck off. Painfully and with prejudice.

Friday, February 18, 2011

Why do we have to hurt our kids for their own good?

My baby girl got her first shots, the day before yesterday, which prompt today's post.

First, having to hold your baby down while someone else hurts them can fuck right off, with bells on. I know it's so she won't get horribly sick later, but the look in those huge eyes when they stuck her chubby little baby legs nearly made me cry.

Second, this guy: Andrew Wakefield. He's another example of sheer evil. I don't know what else to call a guy that tries to scare parents out of getting their kids immunized with one vaccine to try to get his on the market and make money on one hand, and hurts disabled kids on the other, also to make money.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Gonna give myself away a bit, here...

The police chief of Joplin, MO, can fuck right the fucking fuckety fuck right off for trying to ban over the counter sales of Sudafed and its generics altogether. We already have to hand over private data to be allowed to have the pharmacy techs fetch it from behind the counter to stop those eeevil meth cooks from being able to get the ingredients for their eeeevil drugs, and this twatwaffle--who, by the way, DOESN'T FUCKING BOTHER TO COLLECT THE FUCKING INFORMATION FROM THE DIFFERENT FUCKING PHARMACIES AND FIND THE FUCKING CRIMINALS THAT ARE HIS FUCKING JOB TO FUCKING HUNT DOWN--wants to pass legislation that penalizes the 99% of the law abiding population to target the 1% of the population that WOULD JUST LEAVE JOPLIN TO FIND THEIR SHIT ANYWAY.

*Deep breath. Relax.*

I just listened to a bit of interview that fucktard was having on the radio. I think part of what pisses me off the most (besides the fact that he's trying to FUCKING LEGISLATE HIS FUCKING WAY OUT OF FUCKING DOING HIS FUCKING JOB) is that he was pulling all kinds of statistics out of his ass to try to scare people into letting him remove their rights because he knows best. I STRONGLY FUCKING DOUBT that 90% of all pseudoephedrine sales go to make meth. And while I know that shit's powerfully addictive, I also STRONGLY FUCKING DOUBT that it addicts most people on the first sample UNLESS THEY'RE FUCKING ALREADY FUCKING PRONE TO BEING FUCKING ADDICTED TO FUCKING SHIT LIKE THAT.

May the fleas of a million camels infest his armpits and genitalia. May the First Wookie ass-plow him on a diesel powered snowmobile, wearing her limp-wristed husband as a strap on dildo. May he be tarred, feathered, and run out on a rail, all the way to a metro area that would love to have twatwaffles like him dictate their lives by the people of Joplin in the next election that deals with his office.

I hope being angry enough to spit nails doesn't give my baby girl colic.

Friday, February 4, 2011

Al Gore and his global warming

I'm in an area that got slammed by the big winter storm this past week. While I'm thankful that we got no ice, we did get a record amount of snow dumped in one storm (tied for second since records have been kept).

Snow I can handle. This much snow is another matter altogether. We have drifts taller than my son. We also have highs in the teens and lows below zero, and more snow in the forecast.

So global warming can fuck off for one of two reasons: either a) it's somehow causing this record cold and snowy winter; or b) it ran away with its tail between its legs in the teeth of another possible mini-ice-age.

Friday, January 28, 2011


The drop in civil discourse that makes peeing on someone's fucking office door--REPEATEDLY--seem like a reasonable course of action can fuck right the fuck off.

(Still...the ten year old in my sense of humor found it funny, regardless)

Thursday, January 20, 2011

I don't quite have strong enough words for this man.

So-called Dr. Kermit Gosnell.

Abortion is one thing. I don't care which side of the divide one's opinion falls on, whether abortion should be permissible or not (I tend to stand on the side of not, but won't force my beliefs on others). What that individual did is a whole other set of crimes against humanity: he induced labor, delivered living babies, and murdered them. Some of them were at the same point in development as my son, who's now a healthy, rambunctious, hilarious two year old with a personality that just won't stop. Some were even later term.

May he die in screaming agony, bleeding from every orifice, and wake to the realization that he's about to be forever ass-plowed by demons with flaming anvil-shaped cocks the size of Texas. May his wife, who's also implicated in this great evil be punished like Promethius, but with winged demons ripping pieces of her uterus out and eating them, instead of eagles eating her liver. May they each face the horror and shame of knowing their own evil before they die.

Murdering an adult is one thing. This man's forcing helpless, innocent babies into the world so he can murder them is a whole new level of evil.

Friday, January 14, 2011

Could not have said it better.

From Ken: "Fuck off to that filthy little shit in Arizona. I hope they fry his scumbag ass."

Likewise, the sheriff involved can fuck off. Not only has he screwed up, but it seems like he's running for the congressional seat of the woman that got shot in the head. And it's not a sure thing that she's not going to be able to recover and keep it.

The anti-gun Nazis that blame the equipment rather than the crazy fucker that used it can fuck right the fucking fuck off. May they be ass-plowed by the first Wookie on a four wheeler, using her worthless scumbag Commie husband as a strap-on dildo.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

More personal stuff

Infant colds that require traumatizing a baby that's just barely a month old (she absolutely hates the bulb syringe, and will scream like I'm caning her) can fuck off. Especially since it means that this weekend's planned visit to my in-laws is up in the air, which is not fair to my two year old imp who adores his grandparents. So, yeah: anything that makes a tiny baby sick can fuck right the fucking fuck off.

With cheese.