Friday, May 28, 2010

Blood tests

I had my first prenatal appointment on Wednesday. They needed to have drawn about four vials of blood, but could not find a vein. Not in either elbow, wrist, or hand. So I have to go back today for them to try again.

So, blood tests can fuck off. My tiny, fragile veins that make drawing my blood extremely difficult can fuck off. So can the knowledge that they're going to have to poke me in four or five places to get enough for the tests. I hate needles.

The floor is yours. Bitch away.

Friday, May 21, 2010

One of each, today.

First, a big FUCK YEAH! to the rat that photobombed Obama. See below:


...and my brain can fuck off for coming up with too many smart-ass remarks to get one out.

Second, the President of Mexico can FUCK right the FUCKING FUCKETY FUCK off for FUCKING HAVING THE FUCKING GUTS TO FUCKING castigate us for Arizona's new immigration law. You FUCKING HYPOCRITICAL FUCKING ASS-BITING FUCKING RANCID FUCKING DISEASED COCK-LEAK! Mexico's immigration laws are far more harsh, AND are far more strictly enforced, AND YOU FUCKING DARE FUCKING TELL US THAT OUR FUCKING LAWS ARE TOO FUCKING HARSH?!! FUCKING CHANGE YOURS BEFORE YOU FUCKING GET THE FUCKING ETHOS TO FUCKING CRITICIZE OURS!

And Dear Leader can fuck off for joining in the dog-pile on his own country.

May the two of them be ass-plowed by the First Wookie driving a bio-diesel up-armored Humvee. May all of the criminal aliens in the United States stampede over the both of them on their way to claim the amnesty you want to grant them.

And may the both of them rot in hell together for what they're trying to do to this country. Especially the one that was elected president of this country.

Take it away. Have a good weekend.

Friday, May 14, 2010

For Ricki

Passive-aggressive student bullies that try to guilt you into raising their grade, giving them extra credit work, or letting them redo something that you said they couldn't--especially at the end of the semester when you're trying to get caught up with grading--can fuck right the fucking fuck off.

Push-over colleagues that teach them that that's acceptable behavior that works can fuck off with rusted-nail-studded knobs dipped in rancid habanero nacho cheeze.

Thank God I teach online, and don't have to deal with such.

Friday, May 7, 2010

Ann Arbor's elementary principal can fuck off.

You don't close an achievement gap by taking black kids on a field trip that white kids don't get to go on.

He says, “The intent of our field trip was not to segregate or exclude students as has been reported, but rather to address the societal issues, roadblocks and challenges that our African American children will face as they pursue a successful academic education here in our community.”

Listen, fucktard: if you try to close the gap by making one set of kids dumber, your whole school falls behind. Like it or not, the culture that your black kids come from stigmatizes working hard and getting good grades as acting white. If you really want to close the achievement gap, work on that attitude first.

It's all yours.