Reality TV can officially fuck off. It was easy enough to ignore before. I was a snob about it at first, but learned not to be. Everybody has their own form of mindless entertainment. When it was confined to evening broadcasts that I never watched anyway, it didn't bother me. Let cable television come up with the raunchiest, tackiest premise for a show. Who can sell a kidney on the black market the fastest - winner gets a million dollars and seven-and-a-half minutes of fame! Put ten married guys in a room filled with Playboy bunnies and the last guy who doesn't dip his wick wins an Aston Martin and a free hair transplant. "Survivor: Mid-Life Crisis." Whatever.
Well, you know what? I'm back to being a fucking snob about it. Now that these attention-starved morons have trickled in to the real news so that CNN's headlines run like this:
*146 Killed In Afghanistan Attack
*Jon Gosselin Buys A Tube Of Toothpaste
I am officially pissed the fuck off. We've got jackass moron dipshits pulling stupid stunts, manipulating everything from White House security to their own fucking children in some desperate, idiotic, fuckbrained attempt to get their own goddammm reality show. Enough with this Look-At-Me-Me-Me-Me-Me bullshit. If you give a crap about the Gosselins getting divorced outside of a fleeting pinch of sympathy for their children, if you keep up with the Kardashians, if you watch "Jersey Shore" just so you can feel smug because you are not a big enough doofus to actually give yourself a nickname like "The Situation" without a hint of irony, you can FUCK OFF. I know, for a while it was kind of fun, watching in horror and thinking "at least I'm not that dumb," but when we've come to the point where television programming is saturated with Stupid Fucking Asshole shows that millions watch just to feel better because they're not that low, we're talking about a cultural vacuum waiting to happen.
Mark my fucking words. I'm sick to fucking death of the age of No-Talent Celebrity being shoved in my face through the mainstream news. Keep that shit confined to trashy tabloids and gossip sites, but KEEP IT OUT OF THE FUCKING REAL NEWS.
Okay, now it's your turn.
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8 comments:
"...we're talking about a cultural vacuum waiting to happen."
WAITING to happen? You nailed everything, Emily, but that cultural vacuum is already here. At the very least, the cultural air pump is sucking away.
As for me......
In the past, I've vented about certain insecure, self-centered, nanny statist bureaucratic assholes who feel that they can have the authority to run projects without any responsibility. This includes, among other things, their blatant lying on reports, causing people more work for no reason, and sucking money out of projects because they don't have enough work elsewhere (for this organization, the word "downsizing" does not exist). Their lack of integrity, work ethics, respect for other, and simple courtesy is appalling.
Today, I wish to report on two things about these certain insecure, self-centered, nanny statist bureaucratic assholes.
First, they reversed course on a critical report. They claimed they were going to write a negative report, one that would have had major impacts, including political, for reasons best left unstated, save that they were trying strong arm us into more funding. However, they did reverse course, and are re-writing the report to reflect actual conditions, not their own skewed perceptions. For this, I offer a sincere "FUCK YEAH!"
HOWEVER, for the second thing........
Said report was also late, and certain influential people were more than a little pissed about that. Also, they reversed course so fast that I'm surprised that no one broke their necks. One afternoon, negative. The next morning, positive.
In other words, their change of heart was not from the heart, but probably due to a cluebat wielded by an influential person. They were, more likely than not, TOLD to cease and desist.
So while these certain insecure, self-centered, nanny statist bureaucratic assholes are doing the right thing, they are doing it for the wrong reasons.
And for that, they can fuck off and die with a white hot mace whilst swimming in a pool of hot, bubbling cheese.
And, oh yeah, I still haven't read their final report. And it's due next week.
Morons.
I just so totally am fucking tired of our elected representatives...i just can't think straight. the shit they pull to ensure they get re-elected, how they twist and corrupt the rules for their own convenience.
it's just sickening.
Precisely, Emily.
Getting wisdom teeth removed can fuck right off. Even if there is no difficulty, are no complications, and I'm healing fast, it still hurts like a stone bitch. And missing last Friday's FFOT because I felt too bad from having them out the Tuesday before can also fuck off.
The fucking assbags in Congress trying to sneak through a health-care-reform bill that no one who's supposed to vote on it has even seen by forcing the vote on Christmas Eve can fuck off. You FUCKING NANNY-STATE FUCKING RETARDS! Who the FUCK do you FUCKING FUCKS think you FUCKING are? YOU FUCKING WORK FOR US! WE do NOT FUCKING work for YOU BARNY FRANK ASS-SUCKING COCK-SHEATHING MOTHERFUCKERS! And WE THE PEOPLE who FUCKING PUT YOU FUCKING FUCKS IN FUCKING OFFICE do NOT want this FUCKING three foot FUCKING thick FUCKING paper dildo fucking wrapped in a FUCKING sandpaper condom FUCKING rammed up our asses. Y'all might like shit like that, but the rest of us don't.
May the fleas of the camels you shitwits like to blow nest in your genitals. May you writhe in the realization that your douchebaggery has fucked your career, no matter which way the vote goes. May the American people shove a firehose up your asses to give you the high-pressure rancid habanero nacho cheese colonic you so richly deserve in 2010, 2012, and all foreseeable elections in the future, regardless of which party you belong to. May the polar bears you worship as cute, helpless critters swarm the Capitol building and manage not to choke on your rancid, hate-filled pussbag carcasses. May you watch helplessly as each and every one of you is replaced in congress with individuals that the American people trust to fucking do the fucking job they were fucking hired to do, rather than trying to fucking pass shit fucking legislation that a fucking supermajority of the nation does not fucking want shoved up our ass.
...After HH's rant I hardly dare mention my tooth that broke off for no apparent reason night before last.
Esp. since it didn't hurt, and a dentist I've never even seen before was kind enough to squeeze me in between patients to take care of it.
Would like to have no more teeth just randomly jettison parts of themselves, kthxbai.
Dang, Laura, I hate it when that happens. Especially when Emily calls you "Doctor Teeth" and your oldest kid compares you to a Jack 'oLantern.
Fuck off to dying far too young. Death can fuck off and die.
...And thus does the blogosphere in 2009 echo John Donne, who died in 1631
DEATH be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not so,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures bee,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee doe goe,
Rest of their bones, and soules deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleepe as well,
And better then thy stroake; why swell'st thou then;
One short sleepe past, wee wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.
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