People who take ten minutes to explain something that can be just as easily made clear in about thirty fucking seconds can fuck off. You may have all day, but I fucking don't.
Happy Friday. Take it away.
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A place to vent your frustrations and, just maybe, feel a little better for having told them to FO. With Cheese.
27 comments:
The violent anarchist protesters who show up at G7, G20, World Bank, and other meetings can FTFO with a billy club.
Grow the frak up. Take a frakkin' shower. Get a frakkin' job. I know you want the world to work like it did in the caveman days, but there are reasons Neandertals went extinct.
If you want to "change the world" go volunteer at a soup kitchen or do something CONSTRUCTIVE. Chanting, burning stuff, and making people who are gainfully employed in the city you are squatting in fearful for their lives is NOT constructive and just makes those of us who are actually trying to do things to make the world a little better - at least for a few people - angry.
Oh, and if it's true that some guy died because of you preventing the police from getting to him to save his life: you just lost any credibility you had for claiming you want to make the world better.
The thing that really pisses me off about the G20 protestors is that many of them don't have a defined stance. They're just anti-establishment. Well fuck you. Your little anachist's daydream would be more of a fucking nightmare for you than anyone who is used to actually having to earn something. Useless fucks.
Parents who won't let their child do X because when THEY were a child, X sucked for them can FTFO.
Repeat after me: YOUR. KID. IS. NOT. YOU. Just because YOU had a sucky sleepover in the 6th grade doesn't mean your daughter will, and denying her this rite of passage because YOU have a hangup with it is freaking ridiculous.
Grow up.
To second the "get to the point..."
Those people who call meetings 2 hours away from me to hold 6 hour training sessions cram packed with 12 minutes of useful information? Fuck off. E-mail me the info, or set up a video conference...don't waste 2 days of time and gasoline dragging one half of management staff back and forth....
Also? I don't know who hung the "heathen" wreath out on my door, but I've gotten more religious pamphleteers in the past week than I've gotten in the past ten years....thank you for your concern for my soul, but I sold it for jellybeans years ago. Please fuck off and let me sleep in, I get one day off to do so this week...
Tommy: I had a French teacher who once said she and her husband got so sick of the JW and Mormons coming to their door that she started saying, "Desolee, mais nous sommes Druides" ("So sorry, but we're Druids). You could always substitute whatever other name you think they might be afraid of.
other idea: show up to the door naked.
(And I even am a religious person, but I will say it's distinctly off putting to be called to the door in the middle of cooking dinner and asked "If you were to die today, do you know where your soul would go?")
fuck people who don't get to the point. as an old colleague described one of them: "you ask him what time it is and he tells you how a watch works."
Ricki,
I once told some evangelical that I was Jewish just to get them to leave me alone and they came back with some "that's no reason you can't open your heart to Christ" bullshit. That was so beyond rude, I could barely believe it. The way I look at it, these people have terrible manners. They approach you in a way that makes it impossible for you to politely tell them you're not interested (they begin speaking immediately and without pause, etc.). As far as I'm concerend, they deserve whatever rudeness a person can dish out in response. I understand that some religions require missionary work, which is fine, until that work involves getting in my face in an interruptive way without giving me the chance to ask you to go away nicely.
People who go to the pizza buffet, and then just get a salad. Live a little or fuck off. You're clogging the line with bullshit.
First, I wanna put forth a extremely rare "Fuck Yeah!" for the US Senate. Too bad their backbone is curiously elastic. Maybe it's stiffening up some....
Next, FUCK OFF to Al Gore, greenies, global warming, and the late winter weather we are getting in the Pacific Northwest. Not only am I heartily sick of white shit falling from the sky, it is freaking COLD and STORMY, and I want my spring weather so I can say FUCK OFF to mowing my lawn. Not to mention, driving through Snoqualmie Pass while avalanche control measures (i.e., shooting artillery into the hillside) are conducted is not something I care to do. So I can't visit my brother and his wife this weekend. FUCK!!!!!
Third, unrestrained deficit spending To. Save. The. World. can fuck off with a printing press coated in rotten yak cheese. Why not just outsource currency printing by legalizing counterfeiting?
Our Dear Leader's political handlers can fuck off with rusty chainsaws dripping habanero nacho cheeze and spewing black, oily smoke into the air to make the global warming Nazis (who've seem to forgotten that global warming is powered by nuclear fusion--which is in the slowest activity cycle recorded in the last HUNDRED YEARS) hyperventilate. YOU. DO. NOT. GIVE. THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND. A. FUCKING iPOD!!!
Global warming Nazis can fuck off with burning coal mines shoved up their shit chutes. CARBON DIOXIDE IS NOT A POLLUTANT!!! (Well, except for what comes from the global warming Nazis and Congress. Their total waste of space makes them a pollutant.) Every living thing exhales it with every breath--including the poor, innocent animals that would love to eat you the second you let your guard down. Carbon MONOXIDE is the pollutant. Not DIOXIDE. Get your fucking science straight.
Students who can't tell the difference between REQUIRED PAPERS and EXTRA CREDIT (and before you yell at me, Ricki, it's an experimental assignment about blogging and linking research) can fuck the fuck off with their horrible reading skills. NO, your grade will not suffer if you don't do it. It's FUCKING EXTRA FUCKING CREDIT, you fucking morons. EXTRA POINTS. While I'd like to see how well the assignment works before I write it into my general curriculum, I'd be happier if fewer did it, just so I wouldn't have to grade the abysmal efforts of those who DON'T FUCKING UNDERSTAND THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN EXTRA CREDIT AND REQUIRED WRITING.
Why is everyone so angry over that iPod? It wasn't just some low-rent gadget. It also had videos of her last trip to America on it. I thought it was a pretty thoughtful gift, especially since she's famous for loving and tinkering with all kinds of gadgets. She's not one of those crusty old people that shuns technology at all. She probably really *liked* the iPod and the videos.
Probably because it ALSO had all of his speeches on it. "Here, Lilibet, check how smart a brotha is!"
That's a little egotistical for my tastes. YMMV, of course.
Group projects.
I'm with Lisa, Emily. Subtract the Obama-centric material, and it's a thoughtful gift, not unlike those LCD picture frames which display photos at random, and make lovely gifts.
And on top of the other diplomatic gaffes by the Obama Administration, it's a disturbing trend. Thus, the (well deserved, IMHO) dog pile.
Yeah, but the Queen gives all her visitors a framed photograph of herself, so the whole personal wank thing seems to be a pretty mutual gesture during these meetings.
I'm hardly one of the mindless Obama worshippers who think he can do no wrong, but some people are really faulting the guy for the silliest things, some of whom have spent the last eight years complaining about "Bush Derrangement Syndrome."
Touchet, Emily. I am trying not to go down that road myself, and I did offer some constructive criticism (even though it has the 20/20 clarity of hindsight).
As Lisa said, YMMV.
TW: shica. Yes, Mr. AI, she can make her point clearly.
Really, Obama's iPod gift wouldn't be so bad without either his speeches on it, and if she hadn't already had one of her own.
Although, a Kindle full of classic American literature would have been better.
His political handlers should have known that the queen already had one. Just like they should have known that American DVDs don't play in British players. They can fuck off for not doing their homework.
Or maybe they called ahead and found out Gordon Brown owns a multi-regional DVD player...?
I agree with Emily's OP, and with her statements about the iPod. A silver iPod loaded with stuff about the Queen, and also Obama's speeches, is a nice return for a photograph of the Queen and the PC in a silver frame. And Michelle was right not to curtsy - as an American citizen and not a British subject, there was no need for her to.
This however...
Computer issues can still fuck off. Got an old laptop from IT on loan until my new one comes around. Piece of shit has issues.
And yeah, the iPod thing is really small beer but it just seems to be emblematic after so many small gaffes (and bigger gaffes). The Gordon Brown thing with the DVD player - Lord knows I'm not one to who gives much of a fig for the pomp and circumstance of diplomats, but the diplomats that our diplomats have to work with apparently do - but jeez, does no one on this team have any experience with it? Or at least the slightest inclination to show some respect for our special relationship with Britain, despite their recent decline?
Dude, Britain is not "just one of" however many countries.
And after all that, the bowing thing is just ridiculous.
WV: waystr - last words of the guy in the intersection trying to figure out which intersection
Oh, and BTW, fuck off to Microsoft. With my pathetic loaner laptop, I've migrated to Windows XP and Office 2003 at work. 2003 does not paste stuff into Word docs the same way 2000 did (my old 'puter was Windows 2000). And I just learned that if you migrate to Office 2007 (which I will NOT do unless forced to), they have apparently removed the macro recorders, so you have to program all macros from scratch in VBA. Fuck that. I'm okay-versed in VBA, but I like to start with most of what I want to do written by recording it first. Assholes*.
Small Fuck Yeah! though: Powerpoint 2003 does have some excellent improvements over 2000, which I will put to good use here very soon. Joel knows why and how.
*Second only to the vile piece of shit that is [spit] Or*cle [spit], worst fucking piece-of-shit software I ever was forced to use in my life, and I start PCs with DOS 2.0. La**y E**ison is the anti-christ.
I second the FO to the "get to the point" post. Most who are guilty of that just love the sound of their own voice.
I also want to issue a hearty FO to their counterpart, namely my coworker who, whenever anyone tries to explain something to her, keeps saying "Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!" like Joe Pesci in the Lethal Weapon movie. It is the single most irritating sound short of fingernails-on-blackboard.
wv: facula (n.) tenured faculty
Sorry for my late appearance--it's still Friday in the western time zones, right?
I know all about dying to GET TO THE FUCKING POINT from moderating a meeting of ten students from grades 6-12! That and STOP BEATING A DEAD HORSE.
Having two jobs whose schedules constantly threaten to conflict with each other can fuck off.
And the library patrons who "noticed" we have YA biographies now that I've separated them out from the adult ones--and have declared we don't have enough now? You can fuck off and STFU. I'm sorry, I had to weed the freaking collection because nobody could be bothered to walk their asses down to the adult bio section and therefore nothing circulated! Too fucking bad. Just because your kids suddenly have an assignment involving biography doesn't make our collection inadequate. It makes you picky.
Oh, and the lady who strolled up to me at the bookstore cashwrap yesterday demanding to try out a Kindle can fuck off, too. How about being an educated consumer and doing a little research first on how you get one?
I can FO for putting off this stupid paper all semester. Now I have until Monday morning to write a 5-10 page paper on DNA repair processes. Oops.
On the other hand, I did make a chocolate-chip cheesecake yesterday. That has to count for something.
"Now, I have a scheduled meeting with my boss (because, don't think for a second she didn't complain to our superior about this) and I have to spend my break time on Monday in a meeting talking about our feelings and why she feels she’s not being accepted by others."
I wish I didn't believe this.
Also, I'll forestall the next segment of my daughter's submission to this thread by adding that while she was working on her paper she upset her lemonade onto her laptop and fried the keyboard. Yes. Waiting today to find out whether a USB keyboard and mouse will allow her to continue to use the computer at all.
beyondall,
Please tell me that you work in a nursery school and that this person is one of your students...!
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