WTF? Knock it off.

Pardon the "get off my lawn" tone, but I am seriously getting pissed off at how much txt mssg speak and the use of acronyms have begun to slip into mainstream writing. I'm not talking about FBI or IRS or NAFTA or the SAS or NSA. I completely understand that there are times when abbreviation is both practical and economical. I do not, however, want to see "AFAIK," "IIRC," or any other shortened string of non-instututional phrases in professional print. If you are being paid to write, you can at least pay your readers the courtesy of taking the 0.6 extra seconds that will be required to type "if I recall" instead of hitting the caps lock and typing the fucking initials. You are abusing the language of poets and giants. Don't make me seize that quill.

F.O.A.D.!

Your turn.

A little late...

But never TOO late for an FFOT.

Today I would like to give a hearty fuck off to issues that come up on the day I'm trying desperately to clean things up and leave a little early so's I can head up country to do some buck hunting.

And another hearty fuck off with cheese to those who refuse to make a decision, which delays some deadlines, especially when they are the ones pushing to hit this deadline. The only upside on this is that they have been given a list of the things that must be done, and when, to hit said deadline (among those things being said decision), and told in no uncertain terms that every delay in these minor items results sets the deadline back by the same amount of time. They have been warned.

Take it away, folks. And have fun on next week's FFOT, I'll still be upcountry then.

A Special Message To You My Dearest One

Hello. My name is Princess Mustufa Kimabashmatek. I am the recent recipient to the heiring fortune of my late father, King Kumbaga Kimabashmatek, who was unfortunate to have been killed in a recent coup by guerilla factions in the west of our country. As these forces having soon siezed the accounts of the current ruling regime, I am in need for you to help me by accepting a wire transfer in the sum of $500,000,000, of which you will be awarded half for your kind efforts in assisting me in this situation.

Yours truly with love and with God,
Princess Mustufa Kimabashmatek
Kenya
e-mail: youmustbestupid@yahoo.co.hk

The fact that I get at least ten of those a day can fuck off. The scam artists that write them can fuck off. The people who are so greedy, lazy and moronic that they actually believe there are others who just want to shovel money at them, give them free high-priced shit for no reason, or pay them to sit at home on their asses can fuck off.

Do I Still Call Each Post "FFOT" When The Whole Dern Blog is Called That?

Cluelessly self-obsessed, self-impressed morons who think they are far smarter and more interesting than they actually are can fuck off. I'm talking to the Gwyneth "Goop" Paltrows of the world here, who seem to think that their everyday, mundane activities and observations are pearls before swine, as if the rest of the world was populated by hygienically-challenged, uneducated half-wits.

Fuck you, you fucking idiots. And get over yourselves. You're not all that. Actually, in most cases, you're duller and not nearly as smart as you think you are.

Small announcement

Today's FFOT will be posted as the last one at "It Comes in Pints?", for old-times sake. See you there.