Last week we had state and local elections in California. My county only had stupid fucking initiatives up for a vote. It got me thinking - I cannot remember if I have ever voted in a state election where there wasn't a ballot measure to give more money to schools for this or that.
California spends forty percent of its budget on schools. I know they are important. I loved school. So please pardon me when I say YOU HAVE ENOUGH FUCKING MONEY. FUCK OFF WITH THE 'MORE MONEY FOR SCHOOLS' BULLSHIT ALREADY.
YOU.
HAVE.
ENOUGH.
If you find that you don't, you're doing it wrong.
Your turn.
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26 comments:
Oh, cripes, which one to pick this week?
I think I'll issue an FTFO to those who think that they can finance the new health-care boondoggle by "sin taxing" specific things: beer, wine, soda (but just the sugared kind! All of your artificial-sweetener-heads, you get a pass, because you're not part of Teh Obesitiez Epidemix ZOMG!)
Because I think it is singularly heinous and disingenuous of a government to claim that they can both raise revenue and control human behavior AT THE SAME TIME by taxing some "undesirable" consumable.
Because taxing something = you want people to buy MORE of it, so you get more money. But controlling behavior = you want people to use LESS of it, because you're a big fat no-fun nanny.
So unless the govt. is going to start advocating we buy Coke and merlot and Budweiser and pour it down the drain instead of drinking it, this tax makes no consistent logical sense.
The other reason these nannies can FTFO with an Abrocket and some tainted Hydroxycut is the whole "we can solve what we claim is an Epidemic! Of! Unhealthiness! by trying to control what people eat and drink"
Look, dammit: I don't even DRINK damn soda and I'm fat. So how do you explain your "Coke is the source of all obesity" mantra, idiots? And are you going to expand the taxes when you see that taxing beverages doesn't immediately turn us into a nation of Baywatch lifeguards? Fast food next? Then bread? Then just decide to levy extra taxes on everyone who's over 110 pounds?
Government twits who have an insane desire to control people's behavior AND make money off it can really, really take a flying leap.
Ricki,
I just realized I should apologize to our teachers here; I think most do a thankless job. But California schools have these bloated administrations that are largely useless, other than coming up with ways to show poor, skinny school kids covered in flies and eating watered-down porridge from a trough while tyring to learn from a teacher writing in the dirt. They waste millions of dollars a year and then use teachers and students as a prop for claiming the schools must have more money RIGHT! NOW!
And, to tie it in with your rant, they do it with ballot measures that raise sin taxes. "Proposition 22: fifty cent tax on cigarettes. What, do you want to help someone die of cancer or do you want to help children?"
Jeebus, they do that with everything. Just manage to work the word "children" into the language of your proposition, and people automatically vote "yes."
Oh damn, no kidding to all of the above.
I'll correct one thing on the education stuff, though. There is plenty of money devoted to "education", but not enough of it is getting to the schools themselves. It's getting wasted in the bureaucracy and in special programs. The locals in the trenches are getting hit hard.
My dad has been known to say:
"When a politician says something will be 'for the children,' hold on to your wallet."
Anyone who insinuates people who express opposition to new tax or spending measures are anti-child can FTFO. That's almost as bad as calling someone "racist" or "sexist" when they question the decisions/policy of a person who just happens to be a different race or gender from them.
And I take no umbrage at people venting about teachers complaining they need more money; hell, it seems ever district in the nation has a bloated bureaucracy and is throwing money at the "problem" of kids not doing well in school by doing stupid things like buying newer or faster computers. I wouldn't teach in the public (grade) school system on a bet. I'd be tearing out my hair by the end of the first week, and that would be because of colleagues/administration.
Ricki, Emily, I can only second your FFOTs. And Emily's endorsement of the good teachers out there. Blow the administrators; it's time that the schools downsized, and reduce their overhead.
I'm sick of these nanny staters telling me what's good and bad for me. Message for those fuck knuckles: I ALREADY KNOW. And sometimes, I don't care. It's called MODERATION, you void filled skull creatures. Don't make a career out of it, on the taxpayer's dime (i.e., mine!), get out there and do something useful for the public. Like picking up litter from the roads.
And I want to endorse Mr. Bingley's plea for even a Gerald Ford right now.
Lord Almighty, California IS ALREADY IN DEBT, and they are going to BORROW EVEN MORE MONEY!?!?!?!!?! Ahnuld, you are a TOTAL FUCKING IDIOT. To think that I had hopes that California would turn around when you were elected, thanks to your business background. Instead, you dived into the dumpster known as socialism with glee, and gorged yourself at the public trough.
And what REALLY pisses me off is that California is asking The Won™ to "co-sign" the loans.
Let's see....our AAA rating is shaky, we already are WAY over spending, tax revenues are down thanks to the recession, and the nation is being asked to FUCKING CO-SIGN loans for a government that clearly demonstrated their incompetence?!?!! Instead of admitting mistakes, and start fixing the budget, and y'know, governing, within the law, they seek someone else to bail them out with bucket loads of cash.
Words fail me. Cursing is not enough.
We. Are. So. Screwed.
I know I've complained about this before, but celebrity gossip and entertainment news does not belong next to real news. Barring death, it IS NOT FUCKING NEWS. It is entertainment. I should never see two headlines next to each other like this:
Earthquake in Pakistan kills 35
Jon and Kate in contract negotiations for next season of reality show.
JON. AND. KATE. ARE. NOT. FUCKING. NEWS.
Keep that shit on the entertainment pages, not side by side with the stock report.
And while I'm at it, Jon and Kate can fuck off. You CHOSE to be public figures. You ALLOWED cameras to follow you because you are vain, vapid morons who think other people care (and apparently, sadly, they do. At least enough to keep these idiots on the air). I'm so sick of celebrities that whore themselves all over the media and then complain about their lack of privacy. If you want it, then, you know, KEEP YOUR SHIT PRIVATE.
Anyone else hear about the clumsy political maneuvering behind some of the Chrysler dealership franchises being revoked (i.e., a good bunch of profitable franchises are being taken away--without buying back the inventory--because the owners donated to the "wrong" politicians)? That can fuck off big time. So can the government's plan to bail out GM by owning 72% of it.
So can the city in CA that told a pastor and his wife that they cannot hold bible study in their own home.
On a more personal note, my university's beauracracy can really fuck off: the English Department's secretary retired. Yesterday was her last day. Admin refuses to even advertise for a new secretary until the end of July. They won't hire one until just before classes start in August.
A whole lot of us don't quit and go home over the summer, asswipes. There's a lot the secretary does that the faculty hasn't the slightest clue how to do. There's a lot of things the secretary does that the faculty don't have time to do, because they're too busy teaching. And there's a lot of paperwork that needs to be done between the spring and summer semester and between summer and fall that has to do with enrollment that needs to be done, and, once again, faculty doesn't know how, and doesn't have time.
To the administration of my particular university: Fuck you and your faux money-saving asswipery. Twatwaffles, the lot of you.
Ok, I'll bite. Who the fuck are Jon and Kate?
wv: drear. No elaboration necessary.
Dave,
I had to ask, too. They're a couple with a billion kids that have a reality show on some cable channel. I've never seen it, never will, but for some reason, they've been in the news a lot lately. It's absurd. The worst part is that they're complaining about how intrusive the media is in their lives.
Um, fuckheads? Yeah, you have a camera filming your family 24/7 that is edited to be shown on television.
Don't even get me started on the children being denied a normal life for the sake of their desires for attention. Shitstains.
There seem to be an awful lot of "Let's turn this large family into a side show!" shows on television. They mainly infest TLC and Discovery Health, I've found.
Actually all of the so-called "unscripted" shows that follow the life of some goober with a bigger desire for "fame" than brains can FTFO. I HATE "reality" television.
The losers in the whole mess (besides the people who like scripted programs like funny comedies and interesting dramas) are the kids in those families who get denied a normal childhood and who are probably light-years further along the path of "I'm entitled; you OWE me" than the average immature teenager is.
Power that won't stay on for more than five hours at a time?
When did my town realize it had the infrastructure of sub-Saharan Africa?
Jesus. It's like they're cutting power off just to piss people off.
Also, fuck me for not knowing how to set the alarm on my new phone.....
I'll second all fuck offs. I'm tired of throwing good money after bad. If the system is broken, clean it the FUCK up. All those awesome metaphors: sifting through the chaff, getting rid of the dead weight -- DO IT.
I'm so FUCKING tired of empty classrooms in my son's schools (and stupid class sizes) because they can't hire teachers because they don't have the money BECAUSE some useless middle-manager-type FUCKHEAD needs to keep her job at the main school district office.
You don't need MORE money. You need to use the stuff we give you better.
HOLY SHIT WHY IS THAT SO HARD TO UNDERSTAND?!?
GAH!
My own FO is paltry in comparison, and I'll throw my support behind those already presented.
I would like, with passion, joy and verve to push the fuckleheaded bandwagon journalists off a cliff and into a chasm of cattle-prod-driven pain. There is always tragedy. There is always someone who is going to get hurt or worse on an otherwise innocuous device. What happened to Mike Tyson's daughter is horrible, but it doesn't require the slew of OMG!!!! HOME SPORTSESSES EQUIPMENTS KILLS THE KIDS!!! stories that are out there and are coming.
w/v: jurfliz - the act of pushing fuckleheaded bandwagon journalists off a cliff and into a chasm of cattle-prod-driven pain.
CCFOAD. Because it's Relay for Life weekend. And just because.
The news jackals that harassed that poor Scottish woman so badly that she's afraid to go on with the competition can fuck off with hot lead type where it will do the most good. I'm ashamed to be in the same business with you worthless assferrets.
Thanks, Emily. Never heard of them and if I'm lucky I never will again.
I would like to offer a hearty FO to the ass in Tennessee who, at the age of 29, has fathered 20 or 21 kids with at least 11 different women. Guess what? He can't support them on his minimum wage job. Well, no shit. I guess the rest of us will have to do that for him. Words cannot adequately describe the contempt I have for that manchild.
Dave, that story is appalling. Did you see his excuse? "I didn't intend to have this many. It just happened."
"It just happened?" What the fuck kind of answer is that? You mean to say, those sperm, of their own accord, leapt from your unsuspecting loins and randomly fertilized a whole bunch of strange women passing you on the sidewalk?
A joint fuck off to my allergies and the weather. I now own every type of eye drop made for allergy sufferers. Ugh.
That visual is quite arresting, Joel.
Another FO:
Exercise equipment that wears out and breaks can FTFO. As can people who can't give you a straight answer as to how much it would cost to repair and whether it's even possible.
And my stupid feckin' metabolism can also FO for being so slow that I HAVE to exercise an hour a day just in order to be allowed to eat. If it weren't for that exercise, seriously, I'd be on a 1000 calorie a day diet. And even with the exercise and trying to eat reasonably, I'm still fat. It sucks.
But I've heard you have a surprisingly well-toned butt. So it's cool ;)
Ohhhhhhh, there are some really good FO's going here. Please allow me to toss a few more on the bonfire:
#1: Poor communicators can fuck off. The high school librarian asked me WEEKS AGO for my availability to come to the school to promote the summer reading program. I did (and as a side note, I can fuck off for forgetting to say Thursdays are bad b/c I'm at the bookstore), and I didn't get a reply until this Wednesday that she wanted me there (of all days) Thursday. Technically, she didn't even reply--she couldn't find my e-mail (hint: It's all over the fucking YA pages of my library site. Epic FAIL for a librarian)! And I hate last minute shit.
#2: 12- and 14-hour workdays can fuck off. I didn't sleep all week, until this morning.
#3: The online site for the library's summer reading program can fuck off with crackling hot USB cables. Upgrade, my pale white ass. Why the fuck are we spending so much time on something that's supposed to make it easier to keep track of? Oh, and why the fuck are you coming to me at ten minutes to close, to tell me there's a problem?
#4: The obsessed can fuck off. Celebrity (or pseudo-celebrity) gossip, your job, whatever. No, there's nothing wrong with me for wanting to put a temporary fix on the summer reading program and work on fixing it next week. Nobody's going to run into the problem unless they read fifty hours and that ain't gonna happen. No, I'm not going to stay and mess around with it for hours. I have a life outside of my job. You should, too.
As a long time lurker, unfortunately I get to join in on the Cancer Can Fuck Off Club. My brother's wife just had an emergency hysterectomy amongst other scrapings of the innards to clear out a cancer discovered just in the last week. Her mom died of the shit, but she's only 40. And my nieces and nephew who are just 10, 8 and 8 (twins) need their mom as much as my brother can't handle any more stress.
And I can fuck off for spending so many years bitching about my sister-in-law being such a hypochondriac all the time only to have this shit caught because of it.
Wow, Anonymous May 29, 2009 6:31 PM.
Thoughts and prayers for you SIL and brother and their kids.
You're welcome to join us but under the circs it would have been better had you been able to retain your lurker status.
Thoughts and prayers from me too, Anonymous.
CCFOAD.
Ditto on the CCFOAD. I lost a neighbor last weekend. He was a nice guy.
Anon, will keep your SIL in my prayers.
Done, Beyondall.
Thank you very much. Appreciated. =)
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