But this is hockey, where we have more class than other sports, so I'll offer congratulations to Detroit and Carolina for advancing to the third round while
Your turn.
Friday, May 15, 2009
That Was Just Fucking Cruel
The Hockey Gods can fuck off for making me watch both Anaheim and Boston be eliminated from the play0ffs on the same fucking night.
But this is hockey, where we have more class than other sports, so I'll offer congratulations to Detroit and Carolina for advancing to the third round whileopening openly rooting for them to lose.
Your turn.
But this is hockey, where we have more class than other sports, so I'll offer congratulations to Detroit and Carolina for advancing to the third round while
Your turn.
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17 comments:
Everyone who earned an F or a D in my class, who has JUST NOW come to me all sad-faced because they FAILED can ftfo.
NO I DO NOT OFFER EXTRA CREDIT AFTER THE FINAL EXAM
NO I WILL NOT LET YOU HAND IN A PAPER THAT WAS DUE IN FEBRUARY NOW
NO I WILL NOT LET YOU HAVE A 'MULLIGAN' ON THE FINAL
NO I WILL NOT DROP THAT REALLY REALLY BAD TEST GRADE FOR YOU AND RECALCULATE YOUR GRADE OUT OF FEWER POINTS THAN ANYONE ELSE.
Look, I could have helped you if you came to me mid-semester and said, "I don't like the grade I'm earning, what can I do to change it?" I would have done tutoring. I would have suggested study strategies. I might even have permitted you to hand in a late assignment or two.
But coming to me NOW, when I am bat-guano crazy and trying to leave town, and going "wah wah wah YOU FAILED ME," I am not going to be favorably disposed to your request.
If you are complacent about your F in March, you have to be accepting of it in May. Sorry, them's the breaks.
Also: is it too much to ask for you to say "thank you" when I sit down and recalculate your grade with you even though I KNOW it will still be the D? I don't HAVE to do it, you know, I could send you out of my office with a curse and a boot up your backside. (I think there are still some profs that do that; I know there were in my day)
And also: "Please" and "Thank you" and "excuse me" and "I'll understand if you're too busy right now" are NOT that hard to say. I am NOT your servant. And even if I WERE, you should STILL at least say PLEASE.
Jeez, Ricki, that's just pathetic, all around. My condolences.
As for me......
Territorial, deeply entrenched, genuinely conservative bureaucrats who focus on a single task because they are utterly incompetent outside of that, to the exclusion of all else, INCLUDING PUBLIC SAFETY, can fuck off with an oversized plunger dipped in flaming acid while playing the bongos on a burning pyre of regulations.
RETIRE ALREADY, you bunch of worthless fucks. Or find a job flipping burgers (not that I would eat there, mind you). You make this organization look like a collection of self-centered idiots. In large because you ARE self-centered idiots. You are here to do a job, the job is not here for you.
Last week's storm can still fuck off. The electric company had so much to work on that we didn't get the line hooked back up to the house until last night...when we discovered that the nice electricians that had put the meter and masthead back on the house last Saturday had mislabled the wires as they pushed it into the house, and had hooked the ground into the hot and the hot into the ground. So, that can fuck off.
Cleaning out the fridge and freezer can fuck off. Getting caught up on end of semester grading and grade entering can fuck off. So can about two and a half weeks' worth of laundry. All of which is because of being without power for seven full days.
I'd like to give a hearty fuck yeah to my neighbors, who were the ones that actually figured out the problem and got it fixed at 10:00 last night.
HH, you must live near to my parents. My hometown was DECIMATED by 90mph sustained winds (with 106mph gusts!). My parents were VERY lucky that they had minimal damage, most were not. Many prayers are needed for Southern Illinois/Western Kentucky/Southeast Missouri.
Oooo, Ricki. That's awful.
Jeff? Awesome imagery.
HH & Lisa – I was going to give a FOAD to record heat in mid-May. For me, that's over 100. But you can have mine for those winds.
Rather, I'll give a hearty fuck off to the knot in my left shoulder that won't go away.
Another goes to puberty. Last night, my son was determined to be angry and pick a fight with me. For no reason. He was both clingy and pissy at the same time, and I didn't play along.
If this is what our lives are going to be for the next eight years, FUCK.
Oh, and the emergency light by my desk just came on. Can I hope for a mild catastrophe right now? Just a small one. One that will send me home for the day but ensure I still have a job on Monday?
The Special Little Snowflakes™ who make up the area's realtor pool can fuck off with 2 bedrooms, three baths and a massive sinkhole in that desolation they pass off as a brain. It's called a DEADLINE for a reason, you overpaid, smarmy, jot-and-tittle-obsessive fuckleheads!
I don't have time to hold every one of your fucking hands while you dither over whether you like the fucking logo three points to the left or two to the right on your goddam ad. That is going to be in a reader's hand for approximately thirty fucking seconds before they go on to read about something they can fucking afford!
You've had three fucking months to get your information to the salesperson (who also has the brains of a lobotomized salamander, but let's not go there), but in your snowflakery you had to wait until eight o'clock the evening it foes to press. But it's OKAY, because you're the SPECIAL client. Just like every other necktied orangutan that ALSO waited until the last fucking minute to make up what passes for his mind.
Joel - I am so glad I don't do any newspaper advertising any longer. Did it briefly. Not to my liking.
My FO is minor. I'd just like to tell my university to fuck off for changing its minimum credit hour enrollment policy at the last minute. One moment, I'm all good having only 3 hours, student aid rolling in fine, the next: "No, you have to be enrolled in a minimum of 5 hours."
Argh! I only have ONE class left and them I go into individual research and then project/thesis. Basicall, I'm paying for extra classes just to add hours so I can get my aid.
I would just go ahead and go into my project earlier than I had intended, but there's no way I'll get my surveys approved/sent out/returned on time AND write the paper.
To steal Joel's term: Fuckleheads!
Again, ants. Ants can fuck off. They've taken over my kitchen floor where the meltwater from the freezer nastiness has seeped out.
My coffeepot can fuck off and DIE, because it just did. And I really needed a cup of coffee to get me through my grading and grade entering today.
At this point, fate is heaping insult on top of insult, on top of injury.
A new one! The Defense Travel System can fuck off beyond all the realm of all FUCK-OFF-DOMs.
I gave you my receipts, you bitches, don't tell me I owe you shit that I most obviously do not. But, I will again send you the receipts for my flight because you can take money from me. Fuckleheads!
Any I have pale before those above, but I nominate Ricki as "Val for a Day"
I will note two small ones:
Fuck Off to the TSA.
And Fuck Off to spoiled, whiny, little brats, who are the subject of an upcoming, minor rant at FSotBoL.
Oh, and by the way, "friend" is not a damned verb.
"opening rooting for them to lose"
I can fuck off for my bad grammar...I blame the grief.
All right, Ken. I'll get off your lawn. ;)
Heh. That was just a typo and I didn't even notice it.
And the "friend is not a verb" comment was directed at the aforementioned brats, and at one forty-plus father of one of the brats, who really is old enough to know better.
Oh, and fuck off to me for my congenital overuse of commas. And for my incorrect use of "congenital". And for using sentence fragments.
Rain can fuck off, and people scared of the possibility of it can, too. Camping trip planned...based on the weather man, everybody's backed out.
I guess we'll just have to sit inside and drink....
Emily, I was totally thinking how annoyed you'd be today when I heard the hockey scores late last night.
Those "one more thing" people can fuck off. You know, the kind who see you're on the way out the door and stand in your way and tell you last minute things that really could've been left on a note in your mailbox. One of those people made me leave my sunglasses in the library office, dammit. And then that same person called an hour later AT HOME while I'm trying to eat my freaking dinner--again, for something that would've been just fine in a stupid little note. Rrrrr.
Oh, and my paycheck this week? Short again, for the third fucking time in a row. The pseudo-accountant can fuck off, and so can whatever is making our new director so sick that he has yet to come in twice in three weeks. I hope to God the dues I'm paying now will lead to a way better job. By the end of this summer.
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