urgh

Got a list, today.

• Forgetting what day it is...

• Feeling like someone ran over me with a Caterpillar, and having an ant invasion that requires every crumb to be wiped/swept up before the hoard already in my house go get all of their friends...

• Having to leave everything undone because I promised to take the kids up to visit their granny (though, I did get homemade chicken & dumplings out of the deal)...

All of that, can FTFO.  With cheese.

using children

Last night, Odysseus and I ran to Wal-Mart to pick up a last couple of things before going to visit the grandparents tomorrow (the imp will be spending two nights, because Grandma and Grandpa don't want to give him back early Saturday, since Odysseus is working Saturday afternoon).  On our way into the parking lot, we saw one of our little town's semi-professional panhandlers--you know, the ones that are there every day, right around rush hours, but disappear when the traffic does. 

She had a small boy with her. 

So...

To all those who use children to justify whatever new tax/infringement on our rights and freedoms they want to force on us.  To all who use children to cause a spouse pain during fights, divorce, or against an ex-spouse they want revenge on for whatever reason.  To those who bring their retarded children and make them sit and look pitiful to get more money in fundraisers.  To those who can easily leave a child in a church-sponsored free after school program, but choose instead to make the child sit next to them on a sidewalk (and probably cry on command under threat of later beatings).

Fuck.  You.  All. 

May everyone who fucks children over in the name of forwarding their own agenda--whether it happens to be political or personal--find that whatever they're using their children backfires so hard that they wonder what hit them.  May the twatwaffles using their children to hurt their spouse/ex-spouse/parent have their offspring choose their retirement home, after they've seen the manipulation.  May those who have used their children to raise money, either for charities or in panhandling, lose those children to state care. 

May each and every person who even contemplates using a child for their own personal/political gain be driven to suck-start a twelve gauge.

We missed one last week. Everybody's busy. Well, fuck off to Friday meetings. Not today, last week and next week (and alternate weeks). Thank God it's not every week, I don't think I could take that.

Posting

I totally forgot to post the FFOT over here last week.  I've been posting them both at my blog, The Anti-Soma, and here for a while, and last week I just completely forgot. 

Granted, I was just getting over a monster, week-long migraine, but still.

First, one big HOORAY!!! for my imp.  He's gone 3 weeks without #2 in his pull-up, and has had only two wet ones in the whole week.  Next: big boy underpants!  And he's going to get to choose them.

HOA boards can fuck right the fucking fuckety fuck off.  The ones that aren't thieves are needle-dicked regulation-touting joy-killing fuckwads that hate vets and/or children, and use their "agreement" to try to compensate for a lack of sexual prowess and/or ability.

Trends in higher education can fuck off.  I'm getting the distinct impression that I'm going to have to totally rebuild my class site every semester, while my students are starting the classwork.  I'm also getting the impression that my required class size is going to increase by 10 or 20 slots per class, bringing me up to 70-90 students per semester, without a concomitant raise in pay--or permitted grading turnaround times.

End of semester attitude in some students can fuck off.  You didn't turn this paper in on time the first time, hadn't just had a baby as an excuse (like one of your classmates), so why the fucking FUCK would you think you could just go "Oh, and here's that paper that was due before Spring Break" and have any FUCKING expectation that I would fucking be fucking willing to fucking grade it?  No, your well-earned 0 stays.

Headaches can FTFO.  With cheez.

plagiarists

I caught one of my students plagiarizing.  Not just a little, but pretty egregiously.

Then, she had the solid brass ones to tell me it was my fault that she was failing the class, that I wasn't being fair to her.  Then, she told me she was going to go to my boss with one of her classmates that also has a grudge, and they were going to complain and get my decisions (and grades) overturned.

She can fuck off so hard that five generations on either side of her feel violated.  I did not force her to copy a paper from a website, add the class-required header, remove the works cited, and claim it as her own work.  I did my best on keeping my cool, didn't descend to the invective I was strongly tempted to unleash on her, and pointed out that the university policy both defines and sets the consequences for plagiarism, and that she acknowledged that at the beginning of the semester.

She then got even more outraged and went off again, with more verbal abuse--making sure I knew that she had it far harder in her life (lost her husband at 22--lucky bastard doesn't have to put up with her anymore) than anyone else could possibly  have had, and I had no right to suddenly tell her she'd failed a class she paid money for, and I couldn't possibly prove that she'd cheated because she'd never bought a paper.

No, the stupid cunt took one from a free site, and the whole fucking paper popped up when I searched a sentence that was far beyond her writing skills.

She did shut up when I sent her the link.


Okay, sweetie--let me get a few things off my chest: fuck you.   Fuck you, fuck your threat, fuck your plagiarism, fuck your complete inability to follow the rules of readability.  Fuck your emails with one sentence that was six fucking inches long.  Fuck your emails with no capital letters.  Fuck your use of textspeak in your email.  Fuck your defensiveness, and your attempts to try to turn it back on me as my fault.  Fuck your attempts to bully me into giving you an A for a fucking paper you didn't fucking write.  Fuck you for fucking making me fucking dread fucking opening my fucking email for the past fucking day and a fucking half.  Fuck you for fucking existing, you self-centered, fucking stupid, fucking lazy fucking ass cunt.  I don't fucking care that your fucking cousin died, or that you fucking took in her twelve year old daughter--ask for a fucking extension on the fucking paper, instead of fucking ripping off someone else's fucking work, as well as my fucking time all fucking semester.  I fucking grant fucking extensions in circumstances like that. 

May this be the last straw that boots your fucking worthless fucking lazy fucking self out of college.  And may your children, and any child coming into your care, become fucking sterile so that they can't pass your fucking genetics, or pass on your fucking example to future generations of slackers and thieves.

Judge not.

I'm in a much better mood this morning than I have been the last several Fridays, so invective will be lighter than usual.  But I am seriously cheesed off by the whole debacle about Ann Romney "never having worked a day in her life."

Feminazis can FTFO.  With broken glass and rancid habanero cheez. 

I have actually been told, by radical feminists in grad school, that I was betraying the sisterhood by taking Odysseus's last name when we got married.  I've been told that the only valid choice for me, as a woman, was going on for my PhD (which I don't want), and looking for a full time position in an English department (also don't want), and possibly going into administration (really don't want--I teach because I love teaching, not because that's the hurdle to working in Academia, and admin doesn't have time to teach), because we can't have a man telling us what to do!   I had more than one radical feminist tell me that my hobbies were wrong because they were traditional women's work (wrong--knitting was a man's work while he was watching the sheep). 

So, yeah: Feminazis can FTFO.  Susan B. Anthony would be ashamed of the lot of them.

More Speshul Snowflakes

Too emotionally exhausted by temper tantrum.  Go to my post here for your Friday insanity.